Almost a year to the day that I first created this blog (with only one entry) I have finally logged back on to start it back up again and really do it, this time….I promise!!! When I logged on, I couldn’t believe the date of my first, and last, entry which was almost a year ago. Is it really possible that almost a whole year has gone by since I written anything?!?!? I had such high hopes when I finally sat down and wrote my first entry last August but life just got away from me 😦 If I had not already mentioned, I am full-time working mother of two (sometimes three) when my step-daughter is with us. The only reason that I do not included her in the “permanent” count is because I don’t feel it would be fair to present myself as something I am not. Truthfully, she is not with us full time and lives a few hours (by car) away from us so to call myself a full-time mother of three just doesn’t seem fair to those moms out there who are balancing three children either three of their own or any combination of a blended family. While, my blended family situation comes with it’s own challenges because she; a.) doesn’t live with us full-time, b.) lives three hours (6 hours round trip in the car) away from us, c.) we have to share her with her mother and her other family who wants time with her just as much as we do, d.) etc., etc., etc. I could go on with this list, so the bottom line is this….no matter what your situation is…1 kid, 2 kids, 10 kids…blended family or not….WE ALL WORK HARD AT THIS MOM THING!!!!
So where was I??? Oh yes, life getting in the way of this blog. So, I had my second child in April before I started this blog. I had the rest of the school year off for maternity leave and had to return to work full-time in late August for the school year. I knew balancing two children and full-time work was not going to be easy but I had no idea just how hard it was really going to be. I literally felt like I was failing….as a Mom, a psychologist to the children I see, a wife and just about any other hat I was wearing at that time. The school year was off to a crazy start partly because I had not been there in six months and partly because my job just really is crazy but this year was shaping up to be a different kind of crazy. My job just seemed like it was getting harder and harder, some of the parents of the children I see seemed like they were getting angrier and angrier and taking it out on myself and my co-workers, my son was not shaping up to be as good a sleeper as my daughter was so the sleep deprivation was really taking it’s toll and my daughter started preschool that September and was having a rough transition which seemed like it was causing me more anxiety than it was her. I was really not in a good place at all. I don’t mind sharing personal information, especially if any challenge or obstacle I have faced in my life will help someone else, so I don’t mind saying that I have dealt with anxiety for a lot of my life. I made a personal decision to go off of my medication prior to conceiving my daughter because I felt at that time that I could handle life without it and I did for about four years and two pregnancies. After going back to work, I made it until late November and then realized I needed to be back on medication and in therapy for my anxiety. During this time, I had a good friend from work tell me one day that this time in your life when your little ones are at their littlest, that is really about survival. You do what you have to do to survive and be happy, so your kids are happy and that is when I knew what I had to do. Medication and therapy were once again going to have to be packed back into my survival kit if I was going to be able to function and continue to keep all those hats I was wearing, securely on my head.
So by the holidays last year I was really starting to feel like my old self again. Now please don’t ask me what took me so long between the holidays and now to get back on here and “re-start” this blog because I actually have no idea. You would actually think with all the snow I had where I live last winter I should have been able to find the time to sit inside at my computer and write but you know how cabin fever can affect children and adults. I guess after too many snow days life became about survival again and this time from the winter and trying to keep my kids from going crazy when we couldn’t go outside and play!!! That must have been what kept me from my computer. I guess I also wasn’t making it enough of a priority….until now. I need to make this a priority because it is good for me and my hope is….that it helps other people out there.
Although this post has very little to do with being a step-mom, I thought an explanation of where I have been and why I abandoned this blog was in order before I wrote anything else. So, now I promise to be back and keep up this blog much more frequently.

With a renewed promise to be here for you more,
A more relaxed, much calmer and not quite thriving but definitely surviving, Step-mom. XOXO